Too Easy
by Dukes126plus
Summary: How incredibly undemanding it must be to be Bo Duke, to actually believe in simple fairy story definitions of good and evil. From Lulu's Gone Away. /Warnings: Slash, incest./


For no particularly good reason, season six comes next. This is from _Lulu's Gone Away_. Bo's little ride in a runaway trailer, asking Luke what's eating at him, and the pathetic little Boss/Lulu romance all get mentions here.

And also it should be duly noted that the mention of Mary Sue is from canon. I did _not_ make that up.

* * *

He's just sitting there in the passenger seat doing nothing more or less than he does every day. Looking out the windshield, thinking, holding onto various parts of the car as a means of self-preservation. Leave it to Bo to intrude.

"Luke, what's gnawing at you?"

Well. It could be that Lulu's been kidnapped from the Duke farm and held for ransom. Could be that the first attempt to get Lulu back got screwed up by Rosco, who was actually chasing the three Duke kids when he fumbled himself into the way. Could be that a second payoff attempt's about to go down and Luke doesn't like how it feels.

Could be that last one; he decides to go with that.

"I ain't sure… I just got a bad feeling. This is just too easy." And it _is_ too easy, convincing the both of them that this is what is on his mind. "If I was them kidnappers, I'd be headed out of the county. Why ain't they?"

"Because they're greedy and you ain't."

How incredibly undemanding it must be to be Bo Duke, to actually believe in simple fairy story definitions of good and evil. Luke is good and therefore all of his thoughts must be pure.

Most of them are. Some, anyway. The ones about how less than a half hour ago, Bo was out cold in a fast-moving trailer, and that they're both incredibly lucky that Luke managed to stop it safely, those thoughts are pretty pure. The ones where he resented Bo suggesting they split up again are only halfway pure – although if he'd let it happen the way Bo wanted, there'd be no one next to him to ask uncomfortable questions right now. The rest of the thoughts that sneak up on him, the ones about where he wants Bo to be and what he wants him to be doing, they're not even slightly pure.

So yeah, what's gnawing at him _could_ be all those qualms about their family friend (and deadly driver) Lulu Hogg, but it's not. What's gnawing at him is the likelihood that rescuing her is about to take up all of an afternoon that could be spent in better ways.

Except it couldn't, because Bo's an idiot. No taste when it comes to women, but he's got more hormones engaged in attracting them than he has brains in his head.

So it's just as well that they have to chase kidnappers carrying a sack full of money through a mostly-built amusement park, the place he's supposed to bring Mary Sue next week when he'd rather just romp around the place with Bo. It's another distraction to lay on top of years of distractions, when he'd rather lay on…

Most days he can dismiss it that way. Bizarre sexual itch and there are plenty of Hazzard girls willing to scratch it. But every once in a while he stumbles across a day like today, where he found himself in tight quarters, hands and eyes steadying a dazed Bo, who stared back at him with equal concern. Those times it's a lot more dangerous than ducking around some children's maze, waiting to be shot at (but _not_ less scary than losing sight of Bo, who is likely not being half as careful in his pursuit of these nutcases), and more painful than the lucky punch that catches his chin.

Mercifully, fighting with kidnappers takes the edge off, and it seems like he'll get through another rough day. Lulu's safe and Boss is happy, that there is the saddest bit of love he's ever seen. Still, they've managed to figure it out before they die, and that's more than Luke has a hope for.

And anyway, it seems like there's got to be a limit to fights that him and Bo can find to distract themselves. And at the end of each night don't either of them have anyplace else to go but that same tiny bedroom they've shared for the best part of twenty years.

"Ain't it nice?" Bo's slinging a sweaty arm over his shoulders, too hot and heavy and too dang close to him. "Boss and Lulu, I mean?"

Well, even if Luke _was_ just thinking the same thoughts, he wasn't being half as goofy about it as Bo is now. What's nice about it? Rosco's cuffing and stuffing (and huffing and bluffing) men who had evil intentions toward his sister, so he's content enough for the moment. Boss and Lulu are working around ways to make their lips meet and Daisy's hanging on Jesse like an oversized necklace. It's cute, but in two minutes, Boss will turn his attentions back to the neglected Rosco, Lulu will make do with Daisy and a lavish spending spree, Jesse will go back to tending Maudine and he and Bo will…

"It's all right," he allows. "Come on, let's get out of here." It's an excuse to pull himself out from under that arm.

But then there's the fact that those arms are way too long, and Bo grabs hold of his back pocket before he can get too far. "Uncle Jesse!" the brat's calling. "Me and Luke'll be home later. We're gonna check out the park." He gets that conspiratorial wink, the thing Bo's never quite figured out how to do without closing both eyes along the way.

"You just behave yourselves." But Jesse's too touched by Hogg mating rituals to be paying his boys any real mind.

Bo's got ahold of his hand, pulling him back into the park. It might not have been what Luke had in mind, but it seems a worthy enough distraction.

"Come on, Luke!" For all that he's six and a half feet tall now, Bo might as well be five years old, cotton candy sticky and high pitched whiny all over again. "There was a cool spinning thingamajig over here!" Not to mention that the kid's impossible to wear out. Giving in and playing with him is plenty fun, but doesn't help Luke's estimation of himself and his impure thoughts.

They find themselves in front of the haunted house when Bo finally flags and plops himself on what passes for a porch, panting. Luke picks a post to lean on and resists the temptation to go through this building figuring out how all the tricks work. It's just the kind of ride to take whichever pair of boobs Bo settles on for a date; by the time he comes out the other side of the tunnel in that tiny little cart that rides though, they'll be pressed against his chest. It'll work even better if both Bo and boobs are scared and clinging to each other.

"Luke," Bo's not content to just say his name, he's got to grab at Luke's leg too. "Sit. What's eating at you? Lulu's safe and you're still…" thinking too much. "No fun. Now sit down here," his jeans leg's getting pulled on by now, punishment for not moving fast enough. "And talk to me."

He'll sit, but he's not a puppy. He won't speak on command.

Bo's hands are on his shoulders now. "Luke?" It's more temptation than he can stand.

"You want to go figure out how this thing works?" Luke's halfway to his feet, ready to dismantle the whole house if he has to, but Bo's pushing hard against his shoulders. He could break away, but it's clear that Bo doesn't want him to. Ignoring the voice in the back of his head that reminds him that the kid has no idea what's good for him, Luke sits.

"Tell me, Luke."

"I was just thinking how it's lucky, Boss having Lulu." It's not a lie.

"Yeah?" Bo says, like he's expecting more. Of course he is. Luke's sane, after all, and unless a person was crazy, why would he dwell on the Hoggs?

"And then there's Rosco, who's only got Flash."

"Aww, Luke. You're an old softie, worrying after Rosco that way." It's a good thing Bo's being sarcastic or Luke would have to hit him.

"I ain't worried about Rosco," Luke informs him. "I'm worried about you. The way you go through girls, you ain't never really gonna find no one to stay with." And maybe that's the purest thought he can have on the subject.

Bo giggles at him. "You ain't no better."

"I know." It's an undeniable fact. Which leads to: "I ain't enjoying all them girls no more."

Bo has the audacity to feel his forehead.

"Let's go home," Luke snaps, pulling away. Honesty is clearly overrated and under valued in this family.

Bo's got ahold of his hand again. "No, Luke. Sit back down here and talk to me."

"Damn it, Bo!" He's has about as much idiocy and beating around the bush as he can tolerate. "It ain't no big deal! I just ain't that interested in girls anymore!"

Bo's studying on him hard, eyes flicking back and forth between Luke's. His hands are back on Luke's shoulders, squeezing and kneading. _Calm down, Luke._ "All right," he says, licking his lips. "It's all right, Luke."

No, it's not. Bo's scared or worried or whatever he is and Luke should never have let him start this conversation, should never have given in and talked about…

There's a hand on his face. For all that Bo's a toucher, that's just…

Luke must have flinched because, "Trust me," comes next. Luke nods, forces himself to do a reasonable imitation of being relaxed. Bo's closer now. "You ain't," he says, licking his lips again. "Got to bring Mary Sue here next week if'n you don't want to." And with a complete lack of elegance or style, Bo plants his lips on Luke's. The kiss is not particularly good or graceful, but it's easy like breathing, and that'll do.


End file.
